


Rain

by letsgooutintherain



Category: Fullmetal Alchemist (Anime 2003), Fullmetal Alchemist - All Media Types
Genre: M/M, Post-Series
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-20
Updated: 2015-06-20
Packaged: 2018-04-05 06:54:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 907
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4170231
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/letsgooutintherain/pseuds/letsgooutintherain
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ed is still missing in action and Roy misses him with each passing day. Will the rain ever stop?<br/>Post-series fic loosely based on the brotherhood opening song 'Rain'.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Rain

"Brigadier General Mustang, Sir." 

Roy looked up on his way through the door. Hawkeye held an umbrella, a raincoat already over her arm. Roy smiled reassuringly but shook his head.

"Thank you, Lieutenant, but I will be fine." There was disappointment in her eyes, but she nodded anyway, like she always did on those days. He should feel guilty about it, about making her worry, but he couldn't. And he really wanted to get out now.

They didn't understand. There were theories flying around the office. Whether he hoped to catch a cold to avoid paperwork or if he had a serious death wish. Hawkeye knew it was neither, but even she couldn't grasp why he had to go.

Roy stopped his thoughts. It wasn't the time. Not yet. For now he had to be Brigadier General Mustang, so he played the part, head held high, stride sure and determined. Whispers followed him through central command and two years ago he might have liked the thought. Today he didn't care. 

He still wanted to be Fuhrer, but his heart wasn't in it as it had been. He did it, because it was the right thing to do, because Amestris needed someone like him. Because he still had to atone for what he had done. It was what his mind told him, but he no longer felt it. Hadn't since that night he fought Pride. 

When the doors of central command closed behind him, Roy breathed in relief. The air was filled with the smell of wet streets and mud. It was comforting in a way and he stepped out into the pouring rain, guiding his steps towards home.

Contrary to what everyone thought, he liked the rain. It might make him vulnerable. It might make him cold, but what nobody seemed to understand was, that it was easier to handle than the rain in his soul. At least out here he could allow himself to mourn while the rain swallows all traces of tears. 

Out here he could allow himself to remember. The first memory to emerge was the one that haunted him most. Golden eyes, determined but with a hint of fear behind a brave face.

'You'll be fine on your own.' Ed hadn't said it. Roy hadn't either, but it had stood between them none the less on that crossroad. They had hoped for it. Had hoped for one another. 

A shiver made its way down his spine. He was drenched and chilled to the bone, but the cold was only partly from the rain. How could it have gone so wrong? 

It had been over two years. Two year in which Ed had been missing, presumed dead. Roy closed his eyes, but the memory only grew clearer. That last moment when they had locked eyes and he had seen something in Ed's gaze. Something that had ignited his wish for more. He wanted to get to know him properly, to hold him and be hold in return. And for a moment he had seen it mirrored in golden eyes. He knew Ed had seen it too, because for a second there had been a wistful smile on his face.

It had been a cruel time to realize it. Sometimes he wished he hadn't seen it at all, wished they had parted as commanding officer and subordinate, but then, their relationship had always been more difficult than that. 

He should have stopped Ed, even if it would have been a fruitless attempt. Roy knew better than to think he could have kept Ed from finding his brother. He still wished he had tried. Instead he had given Ed his hand, the left one, and Ed had touched it to say goodbye. 

'You'll be fine on your own...' But Roy hadn't been. Roy wasn't. He had been unable to save Selim, unable to save Ed and Al. And now he was unable to move forward. The silent chill of his memories seeped deep into his bones and drained the colour from the world. He had failed them. 

When Roy looked up, his house was only a few meters away and Roy stopped. He should get out of the rain. He really should, but he wasn't ready for reality yet. Wasn't ready to once again fight his own shadows, to not get dragged under by things long passed. He closed his eyes. 

Would it ever stop to rain like this? 

Roy knew better. The rain would never stop and he had nowhere to escape to.

Water splashed as cars drove by, a few lonely pedestrians hurried through the rain, raindrops clattered against windows. 

Cold drops made their way into Roy's collar. And then they suddenly didn't. He could hear them drumming on an umbrella and opened his eyes. Black boots greeted his vision, followed by a brown coat, brown waistcoat, white shirt. He looked up and met golden eyes.

"..." Roy couldn't get a word out. He looked like Ed, despite the wrong colours, despite the ponytail. He looked like Ed, he...

Roy reached out and pulled him into a hug. He clung to him, because if this was a dream he wouldn't let it slip away.

Ed made a startled noise as Roy's drenched uniform soaked Ed's coat in return, but his arms closed around Roy anyway, the top of his head nestled under Roy's chin. And for the first time in two years the rain stopped.

**Author's Note:**

> For Roy/Ed Week 2015. Day 1. I went with the prompt 'A song that reminds you of Roy/Ed'  
> All mistakes are my own.


End file.
